Connective Communication

Investors in a hotel meeting room wait to hear presentations from two utility CEOs, a widely followed financial analyst and a respected portfolio manager. While the CEOs tell of their companies’ respective bright futures, the members of the audience tap away on smartphones or read the newspaper. The financial analyst is next. He begins, “At the end of this presentation, I may not have many friends left in the audience.” At once, phones and papers drop. He describes the losses in the CEOs’ companies and questions their abilities to navigate industry changes. The audience is abuzz when he sits down. Finally the portfolio manager goes to the podium. “When I’m finished,” he says, “I know I won’t have friends left in the audience.” With everyone’s attention, he describes a meeting with his investors, who are angry and upset because the fund is losing money. From the audience, a retiree “with hands the size of meat loaves” shouts, “Why should I invest in your fund?” The portfolio manager pauses, turns to the CEOs and asks, “Why do you deserve this man’s capital, his savings from a lifetime of hard work?” Startled, the CEOs offer canned responses. The CEOs’ remarks were predictable and forgettable. The financial analyst connected with the audience, but his remarks were noteworthy more for their tone and less for their content. The portfolio manager, however, connected with everyone. His message stuck. His authenticity made a difference. This story offers four lessons for becoming an authentic, rock star communicator.

Find the Right Words

The words chosen by the speakers made all the difference. Clichés such as “bright future” anaesthetize audiences. In contrast, the word “friends” transformed the meeting from merely exchanging financial and strategic information to an opportunity for building relationships.

Invite Elephants into the Room

Make an impact by saying what everyone else is afraid to say. The portfolio manager did this by describing the retiree’s hands as “the size of meat loaves.” This image restored the power relationship between the CEOs as managers of the company and their shareholder bosses, including those who need company profits to support their retirement savings. This is why the audience was galvanized by the story.

Speak with an Authentic Purpose

What are you doing to differentiate yourself? How are you using your gifts? Ask your friends and colleagues to name them. The ones that passionately resonate with you are true gifts. Use them, and hard work will seem effortless. Does the work you do lie somewhere near the intersection of your greatest joy and the world’s greatest needs? Choosing self-actualizing work requires courage. Both the analyst and the portfolio manager spoke from a calling—to passionately speak truth to power. Emotional engagement inspires energetic commitment. Words have power. Saying the words “thank you” causes us to exhale slightly. Our bodies move closer to the person we are thanking. When we say, “I appreciate you,” we inhale and move slightly away from our listener. Words reflect our inner truths and emotions. They will evoke emotional responses in our audiences.